NOTE: This is the first entry from the blog I created in December. It jump starts the concept of Kindred Friends, and it also explains that title I mentioned in yesterday's posting.
We all have our own coping mechanisms... ways of dealing with our emotions, especially the stealthy feelings that sneak-attack your insides on a Tuesday afternoon when you're just washing the dishes or walking your hyper dog. Some of us push said pesky feelings aside with a, "Whoa buddy, feelings such as you are not on my agenda today." Others crawl inside of those feelings and wallow like sad seal-pups. Some folks freak out and run screaming for the cover of the nearest janitor's closet.
These days, when I get that feeling inside me - the one that screams (or sometimes naggingly whispers), "Hey, you! You've got something you need to figure out! Hey. Hey, hey! HEY!" - I find myself busying my hands with re-chaosing my organized chaos of a desk, hanging student work around my classroom, or going outside to spin metal objects (more on that later). I get myself all wound up in one of those tasks, but then I ultimately end up calling up Meggy or Adrienne or Vanessa and saying something to the effect of, "Let's drink tea and make something."
So we gather. Yarn surfaces. Tea is brewed (Meggy & I still get excited over how grown up it makes us feel). Sometimes movies are put on. Often candles are lit. At Adrienne's house, we are intermittently greeted by a blond-haired, blue-eyed three year old boy. At Meggy's apartment, bras are optional and her couch is a requirement. At Vanessa's house, we are entertained by stories and commentary from her endearing and witty husband, Mark. No matter which person I'm crafting with, I nearly always end up dissecting my life and whatever it is that caused that initial unsettling feeling (while of course allowing my ally to do the same when she needs to).
I don't think I would've emotionally survived the three daunting years since I graduated from college if I hadn't been able to partake in the drinking of caffeine and the creation of warm, fuzzy objects while talking to one of these beautiful ladies. Each of these three women have very important roles in my life, but they offer me three very different types of companionship.
Adrienne is my geek-chic friend, my teaching-mentor-turned-colleague-and-dear-friend friend. She sends me links to crafty goodness. She lovingly points out when I'm choosing to live in abject emotional situations. She writes novels and encourages me to do the same. Her crafting specialty is delicate, ribbony knitted scarves. She introduced me to clementines, dark chocolate, and pumpkin scones. She got me hooked on hot tea, for goodness' sake! She's one of the kinds of cool that I want to be.
Meggy (whose actual name is Megan, but I rarely call her that) is my BFF. I like to think of her as my favorite inheritance. She was good friends with my favorite cousin, Jess, and we all hung out in their senior year of college. When Jess moved back home after graduation, Meggy and I had already formed a fabulous bond due to some shared personality traits (we're grannies, and we both love quality time with friends). We eat lots of sushi. We sing Glee songs. We sit on her couch and crochet. She lets me cry on her shoulder (even though the idea of someone else's bodily fluids other than her own is very disconcerting to her), and she likes to walk my dog, Stella. All in all, she's my go-to.
Vanessa was the first person I met when I moved here seven years ago. We've both had very busy schedules over the course of our friendship, but we've been able to weave in and out of each other's lives in the most beautiful, God-crafted way. I taught her how to sew and hoop-knit. She taught me not to be ashamed of laughing loudly. I helped her through one of her spiritual lows in college. She helped me through the most spiritually transformational time of my life last summer. I was in her wedding, and she'll be in mine (if God ever plans on me having one). V is my biggest cheerleader, and I'm her biggest fan.
I once said that a great title for a book I should write would be Best Friend Whore, because (a) I've had so many of them over my lifetime, and (b) I tend to have a best friend in this area of my life and a best friend in that area of my life and a best friend in my family and a best friend at work. I like being close to people. I like relationships. I need kindred souls. So maybe that's the purpose of this blog, the reason I've felt the need to start one lately. It's another way to connect, a way to emote. I imagine I'll always have a mug of tea beside me when I do this, and perhaps I'll eventually find that I'm making some new sort of thing. It might not be a scarf, or a cross stitched pillow, or a quilt. But maybe (hopefully) it'll be a read-worthy record, one woman's story that will be a pinprick of words in an hyper-literary world.
"Only passions, great passions, can elevate the soul to great things." --Diderot
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